I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
