is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
