Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize