After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
