i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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