I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
