I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
