escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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