Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
