Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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