I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
