hell yes lets make some ravioli
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
