Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
