no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
i've created a new STD.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
