Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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