i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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