my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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