omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
then he tried to convert me to islam
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
