I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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