found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Randomize
