If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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