I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
