If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
