carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
So squirting runs in the family.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
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