Are we in a gay sports bar?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Randomize
