Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
