Three words: puerto rican gang bang
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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