I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize
