just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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