It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
how drunk are you?
Several
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
