Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My friends, they love my intelligence
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Randomize
