Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
