I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Randomize
