I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
