i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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