check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Operation Purity has been aborted
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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