She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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