His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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