office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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