Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
is wine microwaveable?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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