I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
he shaved USA in his pubs
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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