Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
