I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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