She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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