I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
