even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Terrible idea I love it
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
