Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
