Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
