I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
A bitchslap is in order.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
