I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
you will always have a special place in my vag
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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