i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
